I don’t know what to title this

I don’t want to write an obituary, but I’m afraid it might sound like one. Here it goes. January 20, 2009 at around 3pm our wonderful, loving, amazing dog Isabell died.

Moms aren’t supposed to have favorites. We are supposed to love everyone equally. That’s why I always felt so guilty. I tried to not have a favorite dog. I do love them all the same, it’s not like I don’t love Baby & Maggie as much. It’s just that there was something special about Isabell. I told her all the time that she was my favorite, but she couldn’t tell anyone.

She was my best friend. I talked to her like she was a person. I think if she could have she would have spoken back to me. Instead she would sit next to me and put her hand on my shoulder like she was really listening to me. Or sit on my lap and make me laugh.

She was the type of dog that thought she was a person. We always used to say that she thought Hushbear and I were her birth parents and Baby & Maggie were her pets. She and Baby were such good sisters. They clicked from the moment they met and played together every day. They were so close and loved each other so much.

She was the most intuitive dog I have ever seen. She was there when ever anything happened. If you were sad she would sit right next to you and try to cheer you up. On many occasions I would turn to find that she had placed her favorite toy next to me.

When I was so sick during my pregnancy she had to be with me. I came home from the hospital with the Zofran pump and then got an IV and she insisted on sitting with me. When I miscarried she didn’t leave my side. She stayed in bed with me and when I cried she curled up even closer. She loved to attack the door when the mailman came, but after the miscarriage she started a routine of waiting by the door, but coming back to check on me every couple of minutes.

I thought we had more time with her. I needed more time with her.

We adopted her December 20, 1999 from the Houston Humane Society; she was 13 months old. When I went to look for a dog I knew I wanted to adopt from a shelter. I went to the Humane Society and fell in love with this fluffy mess. She was the only dog not barking at me. She just looked at me, cocked her head and put her paw up on the fence. Kind of like she was saying “Here I am mom, let’s go.”

When Hushbear and I went to pick her up the smell was terrible. She was so stinky that I was gagging the whole way home. She ran out from the back directly to us. She had never met Hushbear and had only seen me for a few minutes. She just knew we were her people. She jumped into my arms and kissed me. After we got her home and got a bath everything was much better.

We bought our house so Bell could have a yard. We lived in an apartment when we adopted her and wanted her to have a big yard of her own to run around in. The bonus was the pool which it turned out she loved. Her daddy and her pool were her two favorite things in her life. No words got her more excited than “Daddy’s home” or “Do you want to go swim swim in the pool?”

She was such a funny little creature and she loved with all of her being. She didn’t trust people right away. She’s not like Baby who loves everyone from the moment they come in the door. You had to earn her trust, but once you did you were hers. If you mentioned Mr. Dan, Mr. Jeremy, Mr. Jason, or Uncle Jacob she would get really excited and watch the door for them.

When Isabell decided she loved you, she would come sit on your lap and crush her head up against your chest. Once she did that, you were one of her people and she loved you forever. She loved “her people” with everything inside her.

We were very lucky to have her for as long as we did. I just thought we had a few more years. It was a fluke that a stray dog found roaming around in Pearland would come to live with us in Meyerland. I don’t really believe in fate, but I feel so lucky that I went to the Humane Society that day.

Loving her made me a better person and the bond that we both had with her made Hushbear and I stronger together. She was our middle girl, she always wanted to be between us. On the couch she sat on one of our laps. She even slept on our bed with her head on one of our pillows. Going to sleep is so hard because I always hold her while I fall asleep. She would be right under the covers with me with her head on my pillow.

I had typed up the details of her last day, but I deleted them. I don’t want to think about that. I want to remember her as the loving amazing little creature that she was. I know she had an amazing life with us, but we were the lucky ones. She gave us so much.

My Darling Isabell,

Mommy and Daddy love you more than you could have ever known. I’m sorry that I couldn’t do more to save you. I promise you, I tried my hardest. By the time I realized how bad it was it was just too late. Everyone will miss you so much. We will take care of Baby and Maggie for you. Thank you for being the best “doghter” we could have ever asked for. You brought so much love and fun into our lives and made our lives so much better. We will always miss our middle girl, our little bug, our swimmy girl, but we are so lucky to have spent the past 9 years with you.

I love you with all my heart,

About SP

Recovering pharmacy technician, History BA, wife to a workaholic, mommy to one pup and two boys, epileptic, vegetarian. I've got a mouth like a sailor & find myself becoming more cynical & more liberal all the time.
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4 Responses to I don’t know what to title this

  1. kelly says:

    I think I have read this post at least 3 times and I had no idea what I could say to make anything easier for you. And I still don’t. But I do know how much you loved Bell and my heart breaks for you.

  2. Season says:

    Thanks Kelly. It’s so hard. I miss her all the time.

  3. Season says:

    Thanks Kelly. It’s so hard. I miss her all the time.

  4. Pingback: and then there was one… | My so Charmed Life

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